1. The ‘Do it for me’
These people drive me nuts. Instead of taking two seconds to Google something that is clearly well-known (or I wouldn’t have mentioned it), they expect me to write and send a potted description for them. Why? It’s slower for you and annoying for me.
My usual response to this is “What’s Google?” (which got me a “Thanks, ass” the other day), but http://lmgtfy.com also works, if you can be bothered.
2. The LET ME GOOGLE THAT FOR YOU
This is the inverse of the above. Example:
In this case, I wanted a personal recommendation. I know how to Google, dammit. I tried explaining this to someone today and she angrily told me she was personally recommending the blog list. WTF?
3. The only-tweets-women
If you go down someone’s timeline and it looks like this:
Avoid. There are plenty of these dudes and they’re creepy as hell.
4. The only-tweets-you
I’ve had quite a few of these lately, possibly as a result of having been on TV. They seem to tweet you all the time, and favourite half the things you say, so you go to their timeline, and:
I don’t know what to do with these ones. Strictly speaking, they haven’t done anything wrong, but it’s pretty weird – worth blocking? I don’t know.
5. The Linkers
Aaaargh. Don’t just send me a link with no context. I have no idea if that’s spam, malware, a giant download that’ll kill my 3G, a video that’s going to start playing out of the office speakers with no warning (why does the sound ALWAYS load before the picture?! My physics teacher told me light travelled faster than sound!), or, least likely, something I actually want to see.
Not to mention all the spambots use this method, and Twitter shortens links to unintelligible garbage by default.
If you do this, I’m not going to click your link. I HOPE YOU’RE HAPPY.
Got more types of annoying tweeters? Add them in the comments.