Number one, from Addison Lee:
Why no, I didn’t know that. I also didn’t know it was a good idea to put negative messages in a supposedly helpful ‘Did you know?’ setting (because it isn’t).
Number two, from Facebook (click for bigger):
I receive this email far too often and the subject line irks me every time. For one thing, they’ve left off ‘Marketplace’ at the end, and for another, it should be and others’ friends rather than other’s. Grr.
Number three, from eBuyer (click for bigger):
I should point out that it’s mostly the messaging rather than the actual copy that vexes me here. We’ve missed you? Is there a more transparent way to say ‘We miss your money’?
Well yes, apparently there is. Namely, ‘…and your friends are more than welcome too!’. Dear god.
And of course it’s incredibly weak to send a ‘we’ve missed you’ email with no incentive to return. Without a cursory 5% off, or something, it’s literally just a reminder to give them some money. Great CRM there.